Monday, November 29, 2010

Four.

A funny thing happened. A tiny little baby was born and then all of a sudden, in a wish, bash, boom FLASH….she was four.
It has been an amazing, core altering, tearful, stressful, remarkable, nothing-could-possibly-be-better (except for the rest of her life) four years. That went by in a blink.
I remember holding my little monkey face when she returned from the NICU in that hotel in Los Angeles and thinking, “I am going to be the worst mother ever. There is no way I can possibly love her more than I love her at this very moment.”
And yet, I do.
After 22 months of not sleeping through the night.
Countless doctors and misdiagnoses.
Being three. Temper tantrums galore.
Saying things like, “I just don’t love you anymore. Enough said.”
My heart grows every day. Infinitely. It really is indescribable.
This little life that has been placed in my hands for a few moments that turned my seemingly important and full life on its ear has given me more joy, hope, desire, aspiration and love than I could ever imagine.
You don’t just become a mother. You change. For life. I often hear the adage that, “Life can’t be all about your children.” I don’t subscribe to that.
Yet, I have all the mothering guilt that is bundled with being a working mom with my own interests and desires.
But my life is all about the G. And soon to be Baby T. All. About. Them.
And that means all is right in the world.
Happy Birthday Gia. You gave me a life that I could not have created in any Disney Pixar studio. With an Academy Award winning creative team and orchestra galore. You are just that amazing. Because of you music starts at just the right moment and there is always a happy ending. Because you are here.
- Yes, we celebrated on her actual birthday. Then for seven days following. I am just now getting around to publicly declaring my love of this special November day. Because really, who cares about my birthday when your kid has one? It rocks.
Pictures to come. Of the Fiesta Galore....because Gia turned Four.

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