Thursday, December 17, 2009

Perfectionist? STOP IT!!!!!

I am not a perfectionist. But I am married to one. It is an interesting dynamic and there are pros and cons to both sides but combined, they really do make a great team.

One of the benefits of being married to a MALE perfectionist is like many men, he does not seem to let it bog him down. But I see so many of my girl friends that are perfectionist paralyze them. They just don't do things because they can not make them perfect.

I think that if you stop trying to be a perfectionist, you get more things done. Making your expectations of yourself or others to out of reach leads to doing nothing or being eternally disappointed. Cut yourself some slack.

You have to expect that if you are trying something new, whether blogging, hanging curtains, starting a new job that there is going to be a learning curve. You may make a few mistakes, but seriously you are not performing neuro surgery or anything....or are you?

I think a lot of perfectionist (including my husband) take on so many tasks that they become overwhelmed and bogged down in the details. If you limit what you are doing you can be a perfectionist like your natural tendency.

Just know that there are really two types of people in the world. Those that are going to be appreciative of your efforts and those that will criticize your efforts regardless of how perfect or imperfect they are. Keeping that in mind, I chose to surround myself with the first and limit my interaction with the second. With the latter group, I do my best and know that really their criticism is there own shortcoming not my perfectly diced onions.

And finally, be good to you. Would you chose to spend all of your time with someone that constantly MADE you do everything perfect? (If the answer is yes, SEEK HELP IMMEDIATELY) So why are you so mean to you?

So, during this holiday season stop fretting about EVERYTHING being perfect and celebrate. Celebrate the tree, celebrate time together, early evenings and time with those that you love. And who doesn't love hot chocolate....I don't think anyone can mess that up. Even a bad cup of hot chocolate is good.


Allie said...

Thanks for that, I really needed this post today, I'm going to drink a cup of hot chocolate now. :)

Nobody Puts Mama In A Corner! said...

Oh yes the male perfectionist!! Know it well! I am sure you remember! Love this post!

jz said...

Happy to see you realize what I have been telling you is the truth. Take time to relax and enjoy what is important in your life. Love Mom